God's not allowed in schools?

I cannot comprehend the tragedy of today. I cannot comprehend evil at such a capacity and I cannot begin to imagine the overwhelming grief that more than 20 families are feeling tonight... The sleep they are losing... The questions they are asking... The things they don't understand. I really don't understand why God allows these things to happen but here is what I do know.

God is in schools. Just because sanctioned prayers left doesn't mean He did or has. Just because people don't say "under God" in the pledge doesn't mean He leaves the premises. It's a good thing we don't decide or control where He goes or when He does things or we would have messed up everything. So it's ironic/funny that Christians are the first ones to say how bad it's gotten because there's not public prayer in schools. I believe prayer is important and I believe we are a nation under God. I do not believe God is limited to our standards or our means of doing things.

He was at my school all day today wondering the halls, teaching geography, sharing life lessons, saying hello to students. He was teaching us history to 7th graders and making kids laugh. He was teaching girls PE and collecting letters for a little boy in Texas. He walked to the office and talked to lots of people and interacted with lots of little troublemakers. By God's grace, I live through Him and in Him and therefore the only way I did anything today was because of Him and therefore, how can you say He's not allowed in schools?! And really if that is the case, we should put our foot down against work places and restaurants and governments who do not recite public prayers and read Scripture at the beginning of their meetings. We should stop buying from retailers that do not put God bless you on their receipts. I don't think those things are bad but I think we've put God in a box where He abides by our rules and mandates. He doesn't nor will He ever. So please think the next time that you think God is not allowed somewhere, you yourself a Christian go there and realize otherwise.

Controversial I know, but isn't grace? -M

A Redemptive Epiphany.

It's amazing how God can use His Word, a dream, and a poster altogether for the same reason to rock my world, stir my heart up, and shake me to the core.

Last night, I was reading Isaiah 42 and 43. I started in Isaiah 42:18 and read through the end of the chapter.... thinking how did Israel miss this!? God is destroying things, turning peoples' lives upside down, making them slave like... they basically had no chance. It even says they did all this stuff and then there was "no one to say, "Send them back." It seemed that no one really gave a care to what was going on with Israel and this was mainly because Israel didn't really show a side that would have made you believe that it cared either! Chapter 42 ends stating: " So he poured out on them his burning anger, the violence of war. It enveloped them in flames, yet they did not understand; it consumed them, but they did not take it to heart." Now stop right there and let that encouragement sink in! (Yeah right!) If you stopped reading there, you would realize that God gave chances but we just don't take it seriously and we just enslave ourselves to ridiculous lifestyles (that we were not meant for).

HOWEVER, if you continue reading into Isaiah 43, you see there is a happy next step. Redemption is near! After Israel acts like a crazy house, God says, "Hold up for a second. You're mine. Have you forgotten that? Live like it!" (That is the MIV, Melissa International Version, not sold in stores.) After Israel walks away and doesn't take seriously anything God's saying to them, He goes back in forgiveness and says, You're mine. Let that sink in (with a deep breath and a huge sigh of relief!). God is in it for redemption. He doesn't walk away and leave us where we are. Thank you Jesus-- that's enough to celebrate.

Now on my epiphany... I read this last night before I went to sleep and it literally shattered my heart and mended it all within the same 20 minutes. Again, thank you Jesus. While sleeping, I had a dream. Every once in a while I'll have a dream that have students or students from the past usually out of nowhere at all. In this dream, I saw a previous student in a local place here in Las Vegas, except he was just messed up from drugs. I saw him and my friends and I took him with us (wherever we were going in the dream). I woke up thinking, "Where on earth did that come from? I haven't even seen this student in almost 2 years!" I didn't think much of it until I was in the middle of teaching 2nd period. I had stopped talking for a minute while students were writing information and I was just looking around my room. On my wall, I have a poster from three students I had 2 years ago. One of those students being the one in my dream. I looked at it without heart.... it's been there for almost 2 years and then while my students were writing and being studious, God began to speak Truth into me that almost welled up into my eyes as tears. I was a little overwhelmed but so grateful that God brought all of it full circle. He brought my mind back to my reading last night and connected it with the dream. When I had this student (and his friends) as 8th graders, they really struggled and I was constantly nagging, asking me a million questions, picking up the mom role, nagging some more, and checking in with other teachers on them. They weren't the brightest in the bunch but there was something in them that stuck out to me and made me see there was something better under the rough and tough. I saw there was something to redeem. There was something that needed to be redeemed and something in them that wanted to be redeemed but there had not really been anyone before that point that had called that much attention to it.  When I saw this student's name on the poster, my heart stirred and God spoke sweetly and patiently to me, "You feel like you missed it with that group of kids. You didn't. It will come back to them later on but now is your chance to redeem the group of kids you have now. This rough and tough group of little thug wannabe's and mouthy sweethearts. They also need to be redeemed. More than ever."

My heart broke to think of how mean I know I've been this year feeling like I had no other choice. How few accolades I've received from students. How rampant the apathy is with this group. How scared kids really are of me (and not just because I'm feisty). Don't get me wrong, I'm not softening up. God didn't let up on Israel... He told them like it was IN LOVE. That is the area I need to work on. I've got the not softening up part down... it needs to be paired with the "IN LOVE" attitude so that my kids know that I'm not doing it to be a jerk but because I see potential that has the potential to be redeemed. God has shown me a few students (one Monday and one today) who understand that and are beginning to see how important reaching their potential is... I'm praying for more than one.

Will you pray with me for a flood of redemption? For the flood gates to open for students to pour out their potential and it be seen as a good thing? I'm ready to encourage it and am grateful that God stirred my heart up and reminded me of my redemptive epiphany that changed my life. I'd literally be lost without it. Thank you Jesus for redemption! -Melis

Learning to Breathe

The other day on the radio, they were talking about a kids first bike, declaring that every kid remembers his or her first bike. I don't know that I remember it really except through pictures of me riding the bike with my new (poor) puppy at a million miles an hour through my yard. He was in the front basket. Ears flailing. That poor puppy faced more drama with me as his owner than anything he could have imagined. I do remember learning to ride a bike without training wheels. Nerve racking. I do remember riding my bike around and around my house next to my grandparents and the tree that scratched me right across the face when I forgot it was there. Later on in life... I hadn't ridden a bike in a while and decided to get back on. While I didn't have to completely start over, I did have to start from my last memory of it.

Sometimes I feel like breathing is like that. There have been times in my life over the last five years where I felt like my life was so far beyond a mess that there was no possible way that I could recover. That's where the problem really began. I can't recover on my own. Sin doesn't cure sin (in case you were wondering). My pride that I could recover ruined my chances of being put back together. When I finally had enough of all the lack of life in me, I turned around and begged Jesus to rescue me from a pit I dug myself. I needed Him to teach me how to live again. I needed Him to live in me again (not that He ever left).

Besides the fact that I was a hot mess beyond belief, I was just plain out mad at God for my loss of breath, as well as His injustice in NOT making miserable those who I felt had hurt me and caused me to lose life (Or at least that was my thought, not truth). They really had not but I felt they contributed to fanning the flame of my hot mess of a life. Even in my brain revisiting this the other day, I realized that I do not understand why God does the things He does or in the order He does it in or why He chooses who He does but He does. I have been reading Isaiah and in 42:3b, it says, "In faithfulness he will bring forth justice." It doesn't say 'Because of your severe hurt or broken heart does He bring justice." It's the effect of His faithfulness. So sometimes when I feel a loss of air, I need to step back and be reminded that He knows best (a lesson I seem to relearn a million times a week!!). His justice is truly my justice. It doesn't matter whether those who have hurt me ever feel remorse, the point is that I realize that my trust must be placed in Him. That's it.

If only it were that simple. Choosing to believe His faithfulness and justice for the best for my life! Be encouraged- you're not alone! -Melis